Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
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