I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
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