What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize