I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Randomize
