please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
