Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
I don't deserve a penis
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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