Nicole vs. Life
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
Randomize
