I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
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