The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
Sext me about skeletons
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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