So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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