end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
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I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
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