physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Randomize
