I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
