trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
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