So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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