What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
