Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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