it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Randomize
