omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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