Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
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