we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
