I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
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