idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
