she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Randomize
