how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
I forgot how hot balto sounded
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Randomize