I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Randomize
