He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
