we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Randomize
