I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Randomize