Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
