Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
