his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Randomize
