Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
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