What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
Randomize
