Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
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I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
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Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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