thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
Randomize
