The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Randomize
