make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
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