Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
