sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Everyone says I win the strip club
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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