If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
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