I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
