I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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