I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
i would punch a child for taco bell
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize