i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
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asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
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Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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