Bisexual people are plain selfish.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Randomize
