does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
being pregnant is like rehab
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
You should frame my arrest warrant.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Randomize
