Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
