And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
Randomize
