And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
tell your sister to shave her snatch
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
did i walk over a car last night?
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
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